Proudly brought to you by Miller High Life......

   Seriously, I want corporate sponsorship! I want soooooo badly to be one of those highly paid assholes who make the money by just talking about what they think. Look at Andy Rooney, he was on 60 minutes for a century or so, and just to tell America what they really thought about things. I know what Americans really think of things, after all, I happen to be one. Maybe a disgruntled one, but one nonetheless...
   What does it really take to be a professional disseminator? I know that a law degree would help, but I also know that my getting one is more than highly unlikely! I'm sure that being telegenic would greatly help my cause, but again, no dice. If only there were a government program to help people get famous...If you can think of any better ideas, just let me know, I'll print them with full credit, I assure you...
   You would think that some young, hip network like Mtv46, or VHwhatever would want an aging, angry metalhead, with a slight drinking problem. Somebody who really knows what child support issues are about, someone who could explain to the younger generation why we hate them so...Again, no dice....I called the networks, but couldn't get through the automated menu...maybe tomorrow. Maybe I'll become a tour guide, and work my way up really fast...maybe I'll shit live poultry too...one never knows these days. I want to be the next Bill O'Reilly, but I fear that my denouncement of the current two-party political system would both fall on deaf ears, and possibly earn me jail time, courtesy of the patriot act, which is still in full force, no matter what you might've heard. That's another rant for another time, believe me!

I know that I need to be more timely, more in touch with current events, more relevant, more informative...I'll try, but I promise nothing! The people I'm chasing didn't get where they were by keeping their opinions to themselves, and I don't plan to either. I'm trying to live the American dream people, help me....remember that you can comment....


Miller High Life, The Champagne of Beers..

I'm amazed...

   Either my friends are a lot more supportive than I ever knew, or you people all need a serious hobby! I never expected that anyone would check this shit out, but I thank you all for doing so...As time goes by, I'll work on expanding the content here, so you'll at least have something more interesting than the inside of my head to set your gaze upon.
   Before anyone else asks me, No, there's nothing wrong with me, I'm just trying to mitigate some of the boredom that I've been feeling lately. After years of ignoring the things that happen inside of my head, I've decided to finally let them out, at least for a bit, and see how it works out. I may not become a better person, but if I can at least make a few people chuckle, then I'm happy. If I can make a few people seek serious counseling, the all the better! They say that change begins at home, and since currently, my only real home is the inside of my cranium, I might as well get to work, I suppose. Lotta shit to fix up in there, believe me...really surprised that it hasn't already been condemned by code enforcement, or burned down by the health department, for that matter.
   Don't be afraid to leave your commentary, thats why I left that option on the page to begin with. Love me, hate me, wanna stab me, whatever, its all copasetic with me. I would've never made my thoughts public if I wasn't ready to be attacked for it, so game on!

   Thanks again everybody, and  I'll try to keep it interesting....

The pointlessness of being me...

   I wonder sometimes what the purpose of being here is, not in any real theological or philosophical sense, but rather just a general curiousity about why I feel so generally bored...Reading is great, but only goes so far sometimes, video games tend to get boring pretty quickly most evenings, drinking is a given, but even the randomness that it provides fails to amuse for long, and even if done while drinking, masturbation (sadly), is also falling victim to the entropy of boredom. I keep trying to convince myself that it will eventually pass, but something inside of me, more primal than intellectual, tries to convince me otherwise. Maybe its just a rut? Helluva big rut, I notice. Maybe my astral cycle dictates a period of loneliness and depression? Maybe O.J. Simpson will find little baby jesus in his heart, and finally admit to killing his ex-wife, too.
   I've been trying to meet new people lately, just to expand my social life a bit, but even that seems doomed sometimes. Facebook is a great way to stay in touch with old friends, but I'm a bit leery of just randomly trying to friend strangers so I can ask "wanna get a drink?" Singles sites have their uses, and I've made some good friends on them in the past, but not only is it slightly creepy, but oddly addictive too. Bars used to be my social account of choice, but since merely walking in to one these days gaurantees that I'm about to drop a hundred bucks, and most of my pride when I try to hit on some completely out of my league girl, only to be shot down, flaming in all of my drunken and ignoble glory...Too many times, that poor smoking hulk at the end of the bar was me.
  I've decided to start this journal for no good reason, other than to amuse myself, and hopefully my friends. I expect its going to look a bit unpolished for a while, in both look and form, but bear with me, it'll get better, of course with my luck nobody will read the damned thing anyway, thereby negating my efforts and probably pissing me off enough to post another verbal rampage that nobody will read, ad infinitum....